Working Woman

Loki: "Green Family Chiropractic...I mean Back and Body Works... previously Serenity Day Spa. This is Loki speaking..."

        

So I suppose it is my turn to tell you all about my new job. Let's say that I am pretty much loving it. I am the "office manager" of a chiropractic/massage office. Yes, that's right. There are two different businesses where I work, which means I have a total of 4 bosses. Can I also just mention that I am the only employee on the chiropractic side and one of three on the massage side? Making me the only office girl. It has been a workout for my brain as I am learning a whole new world. Line 1- Chiro.. Line 2- Massage.  I have to check patients in and out, file their insurance, track claims, book appointments on like 4 different schedules, and try to figure out what each one pays based on their benefits.... and I fold laundry. I also have to decode what it means when Dr. Betty Lou says her diagnosis is 728.85 and the case is Lumbago or Cervicagia, and that she performed a 98941. (can I also mention that Mr Dr. Betty Lou calls the perfomed a SM3 or TA). It's all quite confusing I tell you. I am sure I felt the same way when I had to learn the life insurance business. It will become second nature to me some day. Okay, so that is basically my duties. They have also been without an office manager for a month so a lot of the mundane things have been piling up so I got to take care of all of that. I also walked in and saw a desk with stuff piled up so high on it that looked it reminded me of Shaky's, or Smokey's or the Alcoholic's (or whatever we used to call those people from our previous job although I guess only Stella will get this reference...) but let me just say it was bad. I told them that Stella would have a fit if she saw that desk. Although I may not be very organized at home, I am at work. This drove me crazy for about a week...I had to refrain myself from throwing things away and shoving piles at people and demand that they tell me what I can do with it. The desk now is better...not totally to my liking but you can actually see it now.

Now to the fun part... let me tell you about these people I work with. I noticed an odd thing happening... a lot of the time their normal voices would transform into baby talk. Not talking about babies but talking LIKE babies...to each other. There are no babies in sight when this happens and it happens all the time. The main offenders...37 and 47 year old women. I pointed this out to Betty Lou (who is not a baby talker) and she started laughing so hard she snorted. It just confuses me and if I start talking like that...shoot me. One of the girls (or woman) is very proud of herself. As in she thinks she is HOT STUFF. She always finds a way to lift up her shirt (I guess to adjust her scrubs) and expose her midsection. I just don't get it. She wears really tight shirts as well and we are in the process of ordering more shirts and she has already declared she needs a smaller size. Sheesh. There is another girl (who is not my boss) and she is a character. There is really no way for me to describe her...she talks weird, says weird things, complains when she is busy, complains when she isn't, and just has a very odd personality. She is one of those fugly girls that looks like she is 40 but is really only 20. Okay that wasn't nice but I just had to, like Stella said...it's the truth.

I really do like Betty Lou (well duh) and her mister mister. They are really my bosses...which if I think about it too much it could be weird and maybe degrading...but I don't feel like that. There is professional Betty Lou and KG and then they get on the IM and become children. Especially KG (this is not a good name for him, we shall make a better one later.) They left early one afternoon and as I am sitting at the desk a Microsoft Word blank document pops up and says "Hi Loki....I'm watching you....bahahha." It was like a freaky scary movie.. Apparently, he can remote access my computer. It freaked me out.  

That is all I have for now...as I have only been working 2 weeks. I have missed Blue very much but it has been different this time around. She has been home with her daddy so I haven't had to start hauling her around everywhere. (She scratched poor T's eye so bad he couldnt see correctly and had to go on short term leave at work.) He will be resuming work next week so I will have to drive her out to momma mia's house a few times a week...which isn't so bad since I work right there! I know she is playing and having fun and after about 3 days she gave me a kiss and said bye bye as I left in the morning. Which is great and a little sad since at first she would cling on to me for dear life and look at T and tell him bye...she wanted to go with mommy. I love the weekends again. I also love that I can dress business casual OR wear scrubs. I have yet to build up my scrub collection yet, but soon I will get some t-shirts with the company name and I can wear those with scrub pants taking all of the "what am I going to wear" out of the morning rush. I also don't have to go in until 9, which gives me a little buffer to work out, get ready, and cuddle a bit before heading off on a days work. I have enjoyed having T at home because the roles have swapped and now I get to come home to a clean house and cooked meal. (Although that was really only the case the first week....and every other day after that.) Things will change this coming week and I will have to start planning meals and being the typical working  mom... that's life I suppose.

That's a wrap! Keep trying with those comments everyone! We don't know why they haven't been working, but we miss them!

The Dumpling

Stella: So this week at Pre-K is "Occupation Week." The assignment: Bring something from your parent's job to show off in class. (Oh boy. It's a good thing I have a really impressive job now. hah.) It had to fit in a little paper bag so I sent a super cool "Justice" bag with Bella to take, while thinking that 'this is the best I can do.' I mean, What else could she talk about? Fortunately she hasn't discovered that it's really just a super lame-o job since she thinks the store is WONDERFUL since it is full of crap that little girls pine after. So off she goes to school & her teacher told me (while I was picking her up) that she did a GREAT job of talking about her mommy's job later that day. She told the class how I "hang up clothes, work the cash register & help little girls find their sizes." It is OBVIOUS that she has overheard many conversations about my work. I was oh-so proud. Then she tells me that such-and-such's dad is a police man & such-and-such's dad is a fireman and they brought their police cars & fire trucks to school! They even made little paper police man hats & got stickers. Stella wilted. (That's a Chrysathemum reference for those who have to read the book 10 times a day. You know who you are.)

Anyhow, so what can you do? I'm not in love with my job, but it's okay. I have always liked working retail. There is always something to do.. Something new going on.. But these girls I work with are freakin WACK-A-DOODLES. There is one girl in particular who is the strangest of them all, which I have named The Dumpling. Now The Dumpling was no fan of mine for at least a month. Go figure. Someone that doesn't like me! (Are you happy, Loki?) Working with her was pure torture because she would NEVER talk to me. In fact, she would only bark orders at me or make snide comments about how things should be done. But she'd phrase them like this, "Did you know that you're supposed to be doing this like this..." so as to not sound completely rude, but still in a condescending tone. To which I would smile at her and say, "YEP!" and look at her so lovingly with my eyes that I was really saying, "Of course, you idiot. I know EXACTLY what I'm doing and HOW to do it." Smile :) Eventually it became to where she was the only person I was ever scheduled with and I had to stop and make the command decision to make this pain-in-the-butt-know-it-all-on-a-power-trip-girl my friend. So one day I literally stopped working and went to stand right beside her with one goal in mind: To make this girl like me. "So do you live close to here?" I asked. "Do you like working at this store better or the Penn Sq store?" "Where did you go to college?" "Do you have a boyfriend?" It was like I was Adorable Aggie on our blind date with the 100 questions. (Sorry Saucy, I don't like that name either, but I thought I'd at least try it out.) So off she went rambling on and on about herself becuase if there's one thing I've learned from working with girls all these years is that GIRLS LOVE TO TALK ABOUT THEMSELVES.

Which leads me to the second wack-a-doodle I work with, The Virgin. Now I have no problem with virgins, as we've discussed on the blog before, but if you tell a complete stranger within the first 2 minutes of meeting them about how you are still a virgin, then I'm gonna name you The Virgin. This girl only knows how to talk about herself. Somedays I want to sing Toby Keith's "I wanna talk about ME!" song to her so she'll know what a self-centered person she is and shut up. But I don't. I smile. And I listen. Because I'm a kind person. (Mostly.)

Now back to The Dumpling. You might be wondering why that is her nickname. Well, it's simple. This girl is probably only 5 foot tall and shaped like an icecream cone. A big, fat triple scooped cone. Just imagine if the cone split into two and could waddle around. It is the most bizarre figure I have ever seen. I'm sure there are many other things I could call her but this one amused me the most. What is even more disturbing about this oddly shaped girl is that she dresses in leggings and short shirts. Now I have been known to wear a jegging or two, but I have never once worn a plain legging (outside of the 2nd grade...) And IF I were to ever think I was skinny enough to sport these kinds of pants, I would still wear a shirt long enough to cover up my backside. But The Dumpling has obviously never felt this way. She wears leggings and tank tops and NO BRA. And it is not attractive.

In fact, most of the girls I work with only wear skin tight clothing. And none of these girls are fit... or skinny.... Okay, they're all FAT. So I said it. It's probably because no one gets to eat lunch at that place until after 2 p.m. and by that time you are starving and ready to eat off your arm that you have to practically drag yourself into the Smash Burger and order as much fat as you can to replenish your starving self. Not to mention, they are constantly guzzling soda all day long. I just want to tell them that they should at least be drinking DIET! And exercise? Hah. They complain about just having to bend over and pick things up off the floor. (So... "Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouth" was my verse today from my Daily Bible app. Gee, sure glad I read that. Now I feel a little bad as I spew out all these things. But they are just DESCRIPTIONS. And ACCURATE ones at that... Except the waddling icecream cone description was a little mean. Forgive me for that.) So let's just say that there is nothing wrong with being a confident fat girl. If you feel comfortable showing off every roll and lump you have, then good for you. I just find it odd... and uncomfortable. Like hello! Watch "What Not to Wear" and you can see that even big girls can dress their bodies in flattering ways. I wouldn't be surprised if the entire store was nominated for that show now that I think about it. (Maybe they'd include me for dressing too... too... hmm. Yeah, I just don't know.)

So back to the story at hand, now me & The Dumpling are BFF and she is really the most annoying person ever and I almost regret my decision to befriend her. We have absolutely nothing in common. She hates children. (Why do you work here?) She loves dogs and wants to tell me cute stories about them. (Gag.) She went to art school in Georgia and thinks this is the coolest thing ever. (So what?) She's in love with talking about documentaries. (Boring) And now instead of just bossying me around all day, she has started making check lists for me to complete. (Seriously.) Sometimes I wish that I would have pretended that I didn't know what I was doing because when you are actually good at something you get punished for it. Not to mention, if you are a big-time "manager" at this store it somehow gives you the right to NEVER have to ring people up again. No matter what I am doing or where I am in the store, if someone is ready to check out then this is what I hear... "Uh.. Stella.. I think they're ready!" In other words, although I'm not doing anything important myself, because you are a low life employee that I can boss around, I'm going to make you do all the work and deal with all of the people. It's really not a big deal to me and it wouldn't bother me if it wasn't for the fact that I am usually BUSY and they are STANDING there. And that I have to hear it said to me 100 times a day. Okay, I'm gonna end this here, but let's just say I'm glad that Bella did not repeat any of THESE things to her fellow Pre-K kiddos.

What 3 flavors do you like to order at Braum's?