Stalemate

Loki: I’ve been waiting on Stella to play with me all day... She has spent all day writing her pen pal and then checking the weather report every 5 minutes. (I can see her computer screen from my desk.) I thought she was writing me back! But nope, the pen pal got the love today. And I don’t know what it is so interesting about the weather. I am much more entertaining!

Stella: I was checking flights dumb dumb.

Loki: So the love has not returned on the Sister Banter… Maybe we should get Franny and Sveltlana to come back. They were full of sunshine. Today Stella started telling ChaCha all about her horrible bully of a sister earlier, and I am sure scarred the girl with her exaggerations.

Stella: You’re just pushing it. Quit pushing it.

Loki: And here is the example of how Stella is EXACTLY like our father! I guess I should come up with a “Please write me back! Please write me back… Say YESSSSS!” song.

Stella: You want bread? 3 dollars!

Loki: Sigh. Well, I tried. Readers, I tried. Try again tomorrow... This is a roller coaster! One week we are a go... And then the next.... stalemate.

Comment the first word you think of!

I hate that worm.

Loki: I wrote a blog… it was really profound. But I just couldn’t publish it. I knew Stella would make fun of me to no end and then that would be the end of our blogging career. It probably wasn’t really profound… just a bunch of my ramblings going in circles that no one would understand but me. You know when you are in middle school and you wrote notes to your friends? And you passed them out in between classes? I think those letters from me just talked about nothing over and over and bounced from subject to subject. However I was always a LONG note giver. I hated getting the ones that were only a paragraph long. We used to start notes with “Wuz up? NMH! (not much here)” and then continuing to write about what class we were in even though that person was probably sitting right next to you. We always gave code names for people …hmmm sort of like this blog! (ya know just in case someone saw the note that shouldn’t!) The note was then decorated with lots of scribbles of hearts or flowers or whatever you could possibly draw. When I got to high school I actually passed around a notebook back and forth between one of my friends ( I think Nana Bess gave me the idea!)… and we would write notes to each other that way. It is pretty ridiculous and waste of time but I am sure all kids do that… right?

So this is what kind of hoarder I am…. I have kept my notes from middle school! I even went as far as dividing them up and putting who they were from together. So I have multiple baggies with notes shoved inside and the name of the giver on the outside. It’s a little disturbing. I’ve tried to read them before but they are really ridiculous and never really about anything. You would think after I have moved… 6 times that those notes would get lost or thrown away!!! But No they are currently in my attic.

Stella: What could you have possibly written about that would have been profound? I am very

interested in knowing that. Are you sure it just wasn't a bunch of rhetorical questions piled together into one very long paragraph?
Well, I guess I will comment on the current subject at hand, although it is very hard as I am off today and keep seeing our faboosh mother in her fuzzy pink bathrobe playing "icarly" with Bella. (The way to play this game is to run around and call each other Sam & Carly.) Anyway, I win the prize for biggest nerd note writer or whatever it is you were getting at. I have written my pen pal, Tania, for 15 years. That is 15 years of snail mail from here to Canada. I have a chest in which I keep her letters, although I don't think I have the first few saved.. (tisk tisk for my 11 year old self's organization skills.) By the way, my notes never sounded like yours...

Loki: I was simply trying to give you a quick example of our notes. If you would like I could crawl up in my attic tonight and fish one out for your viewing pleasure. I know that your 11 year old self would love to snoop in my notes. You are quite the snooper… even reading all of Nanabess’ emails. We just gossiped about each other in my notes and of course boys… you and your weird little friends probably developed potions or rants about how you hated the world. You were like goth girls without all that make-up. Anyway I love your weirdness and your friends…. Now. Yes I find your pen pal relationship a little odd. I wonder if there are many other friendships that have lasted that long… over mail! It is quite an accomplishment. Please get her to come here so I can hear her say Abouuuut! I love accents… even dumb ones like Canadian! I had a pen pal once… she sent me stationary… she was from Japan. I think I only wrote her twice.. then Stella took over and wrote her for a year. I guess Stella felt bad about Yuko Yano because I wouldn’t write her back. Stella actually said this weekend… “I didn’t write her for very long… maybe a couple of years!”. Ummm that’s a long time for a pen pal!

Oh and it was a bunch of rhetorical questions—how did you know!

Stella: Why don't you just dazzle us all with your deep thoughts next time instead of picking me apart about everything I do that you think is weird and different? I don't think I'd ever want her to come here because you would just be mean to her and make fun of her for being my pen pal like you always have. You have always been such a rude older sister making fun of me for everything I do. Because I did not play softball & basketball like you did and I didn't write notes drooling over boys like you and your stupid friends did. And then in highschool I didn't drink & party like you so therefore you felt the need to grab the back of my hair and slam my head into the steering wheel over and over again.... You just shouldn't refer to your junior high/high school self ever again because I hate that little worm with a passion.

Loki: Someone is in a mood and a little sensitive! I wasn’t picking you apart. I just said that I had no idea what your notes were like with your friends..and yes I am aware you hated me growing up. Gee. How am I making fun of you? I think it is great that you have kept up a pen pal for 15 years. Hello! I just said I couldn’t write my girl back after 2 times! I don’t care if you played sports… and I never have. I always thought it was cool how you could do things I couldn’t… like buy the cool clothes, have a band , bake, write, and be creative. I cannot help it that my young self offended you so. I never meant to….and didn’t realize you held such hostility towards me. I just thought we were sisters…and different and we wouldn’t/couldn’t be friends until later in life. (at the time—mom telling me we would be best friends like her and Choc. Chip—I thought she was loco). Please let’s be clear… there was nothing wrong with my junior high or high school self. I didn’t “party” until my senior year. That’s one year out of 7 that you may have not liked me for my activities… none of my family did. We do not speak of the Senior Year.. whatever. I made mistakes… but it has made me who I am today. I cannot dwell on it…and neither should you. Next time I should just write a dazzling solo piece...that way my sister doesn’t bring up stuff that she has been burrowing inside her for 10 years. Gee. I am sorry I banged your head on the steering wheel. I don’t know why I did that…something about my temper. I try to not use physical violence. But for some reason we both seem to like to use our fists.

Blah I didn’t know that this blog would end so seriously—I was just talking about dumb notes.
Welcome to our Sisterly Love! Sorry Readers for that public lashing! Please come back tomorrow… and maybe there will be a much happier post.

What kind of weather do you enjoy?!

Woe

Stella: Woe to me. I think I should go into hibernation for the winter. I don’t have any winter clothes. Now that summer is ending so is my joy.

Loki: That is the difference between you and I. I like the winter better. I love snow days! Yeah, no work!!! (This place frequently shuts down due to ICY roads..gotta love it) I love sipping coco by the fire while bundled up in a nice blanket.. ok maybe I never sip coco by the fire. But I do like a good fire. I’ve got some winter clothes that I didn’t get to wear last season (since I was in the maternity clothes last winter—and just rotated the 3 sweaters I had over and over) so surely it will feel like I have all new clothes. Hip Hip Hooray. (Can I still wear the maternity sweaters if I run out of things to wear or am having a "fat" day??) I have bought some fabulous boots that I am sure I am going to get lots of wear out of them. You will hate them by February I am sure.

Stella: If I ever need help falling asleep, I will read this over and over to myself. Actually, I’d probably just have to read it once. Although wanting to correct your spelling of coco to Cocoa would probably keep me awake.

Loki: You have turned into a mean old hag. You have been nothing but RUDE to me this week. SNAP out of it. Where am I supposed to go with 4 sentences, especially when it starts as WOE IS ME? I think of Joey Lawrence: “WHOA!” What am I thinking of Coco Channel? Coco as in the dog? Anyway I don’t know what the winter fashion is either. I feel like if I wear leggings I will look like I am trying to be 16. I cannot wear skinny jeans… because I think you need to BE skinny to wear them. I am thinking that I will just be a grunge this winter. Maybe I will just mimick what you wore all last winter….black and grey pants with black and grey tops. How festive! I feel like we are always 2 years behind the “hip” style. We as in Oklahoma or we as in You and I… either way. Its hard to look at fashion in magazines or online because I do not have a model's body therefore those clothes will not look the same on me. I tried buying a dress once from online... I thought it was sorta baggy so maybe it would fit me the same way it did the model. Ummm it came looking like a big garbage bag (a teal one at that). I promptly returned it back to the store. I am tired of talking fashion-- who cares?! I dont need to impress anyone.

Yes I realize you are going to continue to think I am boring. You are not the only person I am talking too… besides, maybe the readers have more to comment about you hibernating for the winter.

***Stella fell asleep while reading my response.. and gave up on this blog.

Do you think Stella should dress up as the old lady above or this fashionista for Halloween?!

Burned Out

Stella is feeling very unmotived to blog lately. Our posts will be fewer until she feels better. Loki continues to hound her and submit subject matter for approval. However Stella finds everything Loki wants to talk about boring and uninteresting. Loki cannot blog by herself, you cannot banter yourself. I think Bella's birthday party has zapped all of Stella's creativity. Hopefully it will return soon, as for now she will continue to scour the internet for new winter clothes and halloween costume ideas. Feel free to re-read our old posts. Perhaps they are better the 2nd time around!

Fight Night

Loki: We apologize for the delay in posts this week. Stella and I have been fighting lately so we haven't worked on anything to post yet. Well, we're not really fighting, but we have had an overload in sisterly bonding time. So it was time for a break. We just can’t banter when we need some space. So I do apologize. We already work together (which you already know) and then we also spend a good majority of our weekend together too. So when we can't get away from each other for more than 2 minutes then we eventually start bickering about dumb things. (I would also like to mention that as I scribbled a note to Stella in church on Sunday…she edited and corrected my note before handing it back!)

Stella: Yes, thanks for that message Loki. And for the reader's pleasure I have compiled a list of 5 quick & simple things that you can do to irritate your sister. Feel free to try these at home.

1. If you are older, you can act like you know everything.

2. Try to give as much unwanted advice as possible.

3. Keep sharing your opinion even when it is still NOT WANTED.

4. Always act like YOU are the most mature person in the world.

5. Be sure you tell your mother that SHE is to blame (not you of course!)

Loki: Someone is still bitter, I see. I would like to add that the only reason you are irritated with me is because Nana Bess ASKED ME my input on the situation. I was speaking to HER, not YOU. And I didn't say anything bad anyway! Now for the audience's enjoyment, behold the I/M conversation that I had with our mother while I was already at work that caused Stella to become upset with me...

Nana Bess: Stella is sitting here contemplating calling in to work today.

Loki: Baby Blue really enjoyed the pool yesterday. Like she was splashing all around and having so much fun. She would "swim" back and forth to us (waving her arms and kicking her legs) It was really sweet. Then that other baby was there and NOT cute!

Nana Bess: oh...

Loki : I think I am just spoiled.

Nana Bess: ha/ha

Loki: That baby definitely looks cuter in her pictures. haha

Loki: Baby Blue was giving the baby kisses too. It was soo cute then some drunk lady was there dancing like a maniac... but Blue found it funny... so okay..

NanaBess: What is your input on Stella's decision to not come in to work? Any?

Loki: Why is Stella going to call in?

Loki: I don't want to be here either.

NanaBess: She is laying here on the floor... she just doesn't want to go to work today.. she has things to do...

Loki : My thought is if you are going to call in... you need to call before you are supposed to be here.

NanaBess: Well, she has 10 minutes... haha

Loki: Like she would need to call at 7 or whenever she decides she isn't going to come in. Like whenever I call in, I do it the mintue I wake up.

Loki: You can't wait until it's 9... "Oh, I just decided I'm not coming in today!"

Nana Bess: Yes.. I know you do.

Loki: I have things to do today too... but I have to work here. I hate it, she hates it... It's life. Call in on Wednesday if she wants to call in on a day. Do it before or whatever... I don't care. If she is going to call in then she needs to call Sparky herself and not just tell me.

So See? I was asked for my opinion. I was not talking to you. I was trying to talk to my mother about my baby and all she wanted to talk about was you calling in. I just didn't want to be here at work alone. Bleh. Maybe you should get mad at Nana Bess next time and compile a list of things she does to irritate you. I am so much older than you and so much more mature...obviously.

Stella: I would, but I am at home. Enjoying ANOTHER day off.

Do you feel better now?

Blog Love

Loki: If you could see the process in which Stella and I blog you might laugh. (or think we are insane) One of us picks a topic and then sends the other an email… who replies and sends it back ect. (Usually this also involves several IM’s in between…shooting ideas around) However when I get a reply from Stella my dialog has magically changed to where my grammar has become exceedingly efficient, everything is spelled correctly and it makes more sense. She edits me a lot. I tend to ramble… I just read hers and reply. It must make it a lot more difficult being Stella. I am constantly changing things back because I DON’T TALK LIKE THAT! I think a blog is more like talking…I ramble…that’s how I talk so that’s how I blog. I think you readers out there would enjoy my ramblings. Stella sent me a reply to one of our blogs and said in the subject line “Next time why don’t you edit and I will write random junk”. Uhhh I didn’t ask you to edit me. That is your insane OCD (of writing) that you have. I think I have gotten better since we started….right?

Stella: If you could see the process in which Stella and I blog you might laugh. Or perhaps you just might think we are insane. To start, one of us will pick a topic and then send the other one and email with our idea for the first part of the blog. Then we will reply back and forth until we are satisfied or just tired of it. This will usually involve several IM’s in between as well. The funny thing is whenever I get a reply back from Stella my dialog has been magically changed and edited so that my grammar has become exceedingly efficient. Everything is spelled correctly and punctuated properly so that it makes more sense, and people can follow along with what I'm saying. She usually has to edit my writing a lot because I tend to ramble and write things that are off topic and irrelevant to the subject. Whenever I read her emails I reply back without changing anything because Stella is a superb writer. It must make it a lot more difficult for Stella having to deal with my insignificance. I am constantly changing things back to how I wrote them because I LIKE SOUNDING IGNORANT AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TALK PROPERLY! If only I could express my thoughts in a clear, concise manner like my sister!!! Personally, I think a blog should sound more like someone talking, which is why I ramble. Stella disagrees with this idea. I think that the readers out there might enjoy my ramblings. (If only you could make sense of them! But you probably couldn't without Stella's help.) Today Stella sent a reply email to me about one of our blogs we were working on and wrote in the subject line: “Next time why don’t you edit and I will write random junk.” Well Stella, I didn’t ask you to edit me! But I guess you can't help it that you are brillant and wonderful at everything you do. I think I have gotten better at my writing since we started….Right? NO.

Dance with me fat man.

My Sister the Stupid Hater

Loki: My sister refuses to do anything that she deems as stupid. She just says no. Which is probably why her attempt at a part-time cake business did not go so well. One customer wanted a Mickey Mouse themed cake for her 11 year old daughter. She told her she was busy because she thought that was the dumbest cake idea for an 11 year old girl. Our boss' 7 month old baby watches that show. (HOT DOG HOT DOG HOT DIGGITY DOG)Another customer wanted a 3 tiered birthday cake for her husband. Stella's response, "No. I'm not making that cake. No man wants or cares about getting a decorated 3 tiered cake for his birthday. I'm sure most men can't even tell you what their wedding cake looked like. That would be a complete waste of my time." This is probably why she stopped making cakes for other people altogether...
Last week our boss Sparky asked us to write a "SWOT analysis" for our job. You know the human resources ploy to get you to focus on what you could be doing with your work. Sparky sent us his own answers already and wanted us to come up with our own "Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats." But Stella thinks this is stupid because most everything about our job is stupid. Personally, I just think it is just to give us something to do. Stella could easily make up her answers and just turn something in. She is creative, and even I have the brains to come up with some spiffy replies to my strengths and opportunities (most of which are just to work on being nicer to the grumpy old men I have to deal with daily.) But NO. Stella thinks it is STUPID and a waste of time to analyze her job so she never did it. I turned in my answers already (like the good little employee I am- haha) but she refused to do it. Today Sparky asked her where her "homework" was so she starts sending me messages asking me what dumb answers I wrote down in her feeble attempt to participate in the stupidity. After trying to think of answers for 2 seconds, she gave up and stated "They can just fire me. I'm not doing this. It's stupid." Yes, the SWOT analysis is dumb, but hello! You have to do dumb things sometimes. You can't just go through life refusing to do everything that you think is stupid. Or can you??!
Stella: Today I think you & this blog are stupid. So guess what- I'm not going to do it.


Who said we have to go through life doing things we don't want to (besides our mothers) ?? What's your take on it?