Keepin Up with the Jones'

Loki: I think Stella has a secret boyfriend. She has been sprucing herself up the last couple of months. I am starting to wonder what exactly is going on. She is starting to make me feel frumpy. I don't like feeling frumpy. She is exercising like crazy, (which we all already know,) but now she is tanning, buying new clothes, new shoes, and she even put a feather in her hair. I don't really get the feather... I actually thought you were talking about the kind that hung out below your hair line. I am intrigued to see this feather extension in person. I feel like I am not keeping up. I went shopping this week for my b-day and I wanted to buy pajama pants and yoga pants more than I did nice pants. I was drawn to the t-shirts rather than the tube top dresses. I think my skin is probably see-through right now and I am not in the least worried about it. I am the kind of gal that goes as long as possible in between hair cuts. I love getting bangs but I don't go to the salon enough to keep them. Either that or I attempt to cut them myself....which never really works out too well. I will wear shoes that are falling apart if they are the ones that I happen to grab right before I leave. (Really I would wear flip flops everywhere if I could.) I want to be cool... what can I do?

Stella: A secret boyfriend? I WISH! haha. That is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. I would die for ANY contact with ANYONE of the opposite sex. But alas, the only men I see that aren't related to me is Bob Harper (The Biggest Loser trainer,) Clinton (from TLC's What Not To Wear,) Boston Rob (Survivor,) and sometimes - yes SOMETIMES!- when I'm driving past another car I'll look up and there will be a man in the vehicle next to me. Yes, a real LIVE man. Unfortunately, that's about it. Yes, I'm definitely hiding something...

Anyhow, moving on... I feel frumpafied a lot too. I don't think there is anything wrong with taking care of yourself. But don't try to talk to Mom about it if you do. "Who are you trying to impress!?!" she'll snarl at you. She might as well just say, "Why do you even bother getting out of bed in the morning?" or even "No one ever looks at you! You are INVISIBLE!" When I reprimand her for being so negative she says, "Oh, I didn't really mean it like that." But I know better. She knows that I live in a hole and why should you decorate something stuck down in a hole?! By the way, I love my feather. Steven Tyler, eat your heart out. (Again, another man in my life.)

Loki: I wish I could help you out but the only man I see is my man...and well, that doesn't help any. I hardly even see him as it is. Moving on ... perhaps my mission at your "party"... (and by party I mean your 2 friends and me and my friend) shall find you a date. Would you go on a date? Yes, yes, we have already spoken of the caliber of men that we may or may not find at an adult establishment...but one never knows. Anyway, Bess just doesn't know how to spend money on herself... she isn't used to it anyway. I don't have the money to blow on myself. I used to, but then I became unemployed and I guess un-hirable. Maybe one day that will change and we can take our little daughters and go get mani's and pedi's. I hope one day Blue is old enough that she will keep Bella entertained...but by then she might be hanging out with 16 year olds.

Stella: Why can't people paint their own nails? I don't get it. Do you not know how to scrub your own foot or file a nail? Also, I do not want you to ever feel it is your goal to find me a date. That only equals total humiliation on my part. I do not want to have to "date." It just seems like a big hassle and waste of time. Blah. No dating for me. I'm just going to wait for God to command someone to marry me. You know, like in that stupid book I just read. (I also realized that "soiled dove" was not a term Curls came up with herself, which made me very glad.) I think this is a great plan and requires me to do nothing at all. I just have to walk by someone that saint-like to listen to such a command. Hah. Didn't we talk about this on here already? I feel this is a repeat.


Loki: I dont know why people don't paint their own nails. I only said such things because it sounded like a prissy thing you would want to do in the future... you know something else to pamper yourself.. Yes this blog is beginning to repeat itself. But what can I say? We are not doing anything entertaining and without working side by side and then gossiping about the crazy people we work with we are forced to talk about you and your non existent dating life. While I am sure God will place you in front of your future husband I do think you have to be a little proactive about it...or at least open to the idea. Its not like you will be walking down the street and a man/boy will have a big giant red arrow above his head. I say man/boy because you haven't seemed to graduate to a man yet...and are only attracted to those man/boys (that is a blog we have already done). Anyway perhaps you should join one of those dating websites...you can decide while hiding in your room in your pj's. That was too many prepositions for me. I must go now and attend to my baby...who has snatched a picture of herself and is kissing it. Weird..yes but still cute.

What thing would you like to do to pamper yourself? 

PS...I'm pretty sure Stella actually got a pedicure this week