Banter Rules

Stella: I thought we would go ahead and list out some "rules" for the bantering viewers as the Cougar suggested. First of all, Rule #1 would have to be that Loki has to respect my blogging philosophy of Quality vs. Quantity, as she pointed out herself. There is no reason to drone on just for the sake of it. Posts should only be done when each writer is enjoying themselves. (Or in other words, I will play with you when I want to play! And that's only if it can be fun and not work or pressure.) Now that we've settled that, let's lay it out for the fans. Rule #2: Spouses should not have to be forced into reading our gibberish. I feel embarrassed enough about my life... In order to keep my self-esteem somewhat existant, I would have to think that there are no readers of the opposite sex. On that note, Rule #3... Everyone should always think of my patheticness as both amusing and endearing. I would also like it if you thought my bitter, rude comments were just silly, meaningless jokes. Please don't see these as "hurtful insults" or a reason to bump me up to the top of your prayer list. I swear I do behave like a normal person and don't hate the world... all the time.

Loki: My rules to you:  Rule #4: You can not be hateful to me if you think my topic is not of use. Simply delete it or start over with some other wonderful idea. I, in turn, will try to realize that we do not have to post every day of the week. Please also keep in mind that not every post has to be a masterpeice... Sometimes they can be dumb rantings of nothingness--which still equals entertainment.  Rule #5: No posting without my acknowledge. I sometimes jabber and I don't realize how ridiculous I sound. (I just realized I put acknowledge instead of knowledge--- you can still correct silly mistakes like that.) Now to the readers: Rule #6: Please know that I do have brains and sometimes it just does not translate. Rule #7: I think you can show whomever you want our masterpieces... Preferably someone who has lots of  money and wants to advertise on our page. I could make money doing this! Also, on that note, please know that we both pretend that we are only speaking to each other, and we do try to not think about who is reading... It does make it harder to think that maybe one of my friends is reading this...(Sorta like how we pretend Batman and Blondie don't read the blog, but we know they do.) I really don't want to put RULES on the blog...like you may only read this if you are wearing red! I just hope you come back!

Stella: You really are no fun. I am not coming up with serious actual "club house rules." You understand that part, right? Sometimes I question your sense of humor.Wait, that's what the "old" me would have said... So the "new" me would instead say: Golly gosh darn gee willikers. The good Lord sure made both of us with a different sense of humor. That's hard for me to do. Now on to your rules... If I am being forced to read your ridiculous ramblings all the time then I think it is only fair that I can share that pain and torture with others. It is for the purpose you intended it for as well. It's not as if I am pouring through your diary and secretly posting it online. You wrote those things, and I can't help it when you sound like a complete moron. In fact, I get a good laugh out of posting your "masterpeices" without your consent. So. Rule #6: If Loki sounds moronic, it is only because she has been trapped in a house all day with a baby and has forgotten how to think intellectually. (Also, you should get it out of your head that someone would pay you to read this.) Now I am going to continue on writing my own rules (that.. yes, Loki,  do not have to really be followed.) Rule #8: Bantering fans should post comments at least once a week. If you are taking actual time out of your day to read such nonsense, then you should at least let us know that you are out there... in the great wide void... so that we know that what we do has meaning... If something we said touched you or spoke to you personally, then please share that with us. Actually, I don't feel there is any meaning in this, but I thought it sounded good and funny. You should especially comment if you are from a foreign country, or are black and was offended at Saucy's semi-racist remarks. That would MAKE MY DAY. Let's see.. Rule #9: If you happen to see me in public and have figured out my true identity, although we are supposed to be anonymous, then please, I beg you... Do not ask me for my autograph. It's just a little embarrassing for my friends & family to always have so much attention on me when we're out in public. Instead, please send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the address provided at the bottom and I will send you a copy of my John Hancock free of charge.

Loki: Yes Dear Stella you are quite the hoot.  I would like to say that Stella likes to blog and then let's me respond and then she goes back and re-words some of hers to sound better. She changes her first paragraph sometimes altogether which then increases my moronicness. (or makes it appear so) She does this all the time. I always say something about how she changed this or that and I have even blogged about it... although you dear readers would never know because she erases that before posting. Sorry, I ran out of steam and out of sarcasm.

Stella: Thanks for going way off topic and making the entire paragraph above irrelevant to the rest of the post. You have violated Rule #1, 4 and 6. You are hereby banned from the club.

Who RULES your life?