The Classic Black Dress vs. 11 pairs of Sunglasses

Loki: My sister and I are very much opposites. For example, in my closet I still have a little black dress from my freshman year in high school. (Or maybe it’s from the 8th grade?) I actually wore it to a friend's rehearsal dinner not too long ago. I posted a picture of me online wearing it, and Stella just had to let the world know just how old that dress was! Umm… black dresses do not go out of style! Stella, on the other hand, is a shopaholic. I think she hoards things because she felt deprived as a child. She has been on a shopping spree for about a year now anyway. Most of her spending consists of buying new clothes for Bella, which would be perfectly fine except the kid has way too many clothes! I’m not complaining because I will eventually get all of these clothes handed down to me for my Baby Blue. Seriously, I will not have to buy her new clothes EVER. But I do have to admit I have a tendency to hoard some things that are no longer in style. Ya know, in case maybe someday I get back down to my good ole high school size and can fit into those jeans again! I know that idea is rather ridiculous, and I blame that on my mother. We had to have an intervention with Bess... she was saving some real doozies in that closet of hers.

Stella: Our mom really is a hoarder especially when it comes to leftovers. She hates to be told that, but she’ll save things like a teaspoon of sauerkraut or a tablespoon of refried beans like it’s the Great Depression. However, I would just like to say that I don’t think there is anything wrong with a little shopping indulgence every now and then. Sure, I have recently bought a lot of cute new tops and dresses, and I am constantly buying Bella new clothes and toys. And so what if I just cleaned out 11 pairs of sunglasses from my car? If you really must know, I went without shopping for myself for about 3 years after I became a mom! Don’t you feel sorry for me now? I actually just bought a new pair of jeans for the first time in 5 years this past April after watching so much “What Not to Wear” I thought my family was going to turn me into the show. Before I had a baby I worked in retail, and my entire paycheck went towards new clothes. But after little Bella was born I became quite the schlumpadink. And of course, all the clothes I had devoted my paychecks to in the past were out of style and no longer fit my new mommy size. My most recent work wardrobe consisted of one pair of gray pants, three black shirts and some black house slippers that almost looked like ballet flats. Don’t laugh.. they were comfy, and I work in an office with no one to impress! So I recently decided to try as hard as possible to get myself out of the slump and nothing Loki says will make me feel bad about it! She’s just jealous because she’s a mom now so she can’t spend all her money on just herself anymore.

Loki: I’m not trying to make you feel bad..you do look rather cute nowadays. But could you share the love with someone other than yourself? Oh no! We aren’t the same size? Well, darn. Then why don’t you at least share some of that jewelry collection with me? (She has so much of it that half of it still has the tags.) Or why can’t I borrow a pair of sunglasses? I could always use sunglasses! Not even gonna share those with me for the 4 minutes I ride with you in your car? I guess our teenage years really did scar you when I used to steal your clothes and you wouldn’t even know I was wearing them until you saw me later walking around school in them when it was too late to do anything about it...haha! (She ended up putting a lock on her closet door to keep me out!)

Stella: So what are we talking about here? My obsessive compulsive tendencies to buy things or your ridiculous way or wearing things that aren’t in style or fashionable? First of all, you used to steal my clothes from me in high school and then proceed to smoke in them. Several shirts were ruined because of that nasty habit! Not to mention, I still can’t trust you to return things to me in the same condition. I guess it’s not your fault you are so careless and I am! Plus, I just don’t have any to spare. Not a pair to spare! Anyway, if you want to talk about how I like to have nice things then we should probably discuss how you like to just make-do with things. Like how you tore out a piece of your suitcase covering to fasten it as a tank top in between your dress. (I know, it’s hard to even describe how she concocted that.) Or how one time you wore a dress tucked into your jeans as if it were a shirt.. You’ve also tried to use white out to clean a dirty spot on your shirt… You’ve stapled your skirt together when it ripped… And your little black dress from freshman year is and was and will remain to be OUT OF STYLE! Something that you wore back in 1998 cannot still be attractive!!!
Are you saving a pair of jeans from highschool that you’ll never fit into again?